First-time guests to our house are sometimes surprised to see that we don’t have a formal living room. The owners of this house before us certainly did. That room is prominently located-you walk into it coming in our front door, and it has a large bay window that looks out on the front yard. And if you don’t count the open floor plan that flows our kitchen into our dining room into our TV room, it is the largest room on the first floor.
Instead, we’ve made it the play room for our children. It’s a space for their toys, a play kitchen, a cupboard full of games, a bookshelf with children’s books, and an arts and crafts table. Plus, it’s directly off the kitchen where we spend much of our time, allowing easy parental supervision. There’s also something to be said, though, for having the first room you walk into upon entering our house be a play room that’s used for hours of every day, instead of a formal living room in which we’d spend little time actually living.
For me, the kitchen is my play room (it sometimes is for Timothy, too, as you can see!) and cooking is a leisure activity. For me individually and us as a family, cooking is one way we choose to spend our time. Whether it’s Kelli and me putting on a CD of classical music, pouring a glass of wine, and tag-teaming on a meal, or one of the girls walking in while we’re cooking saying “I want to help,” the kitchen is a hub of our family life.
For my birthday recently-when I had the options to a) suggest we go out to a restaurant, b) plan another activity for the day, and/or c) take a load off while the family spoiled their daddy-instead I chose to spend my birthday in the kitchen. In total I think Kelli and I together spent four hours that day in the kitchen … making mozzarella sticks, shucking clams, charring Brussels sprouts, searing beef, making dessert.
I know that to some people spending that much time in the kitchen may sound like a chore, like you’re tied to this domestic activity with a ball and chain when you could be doing something else. But for me, it was pure pleasure.
Americans, I think, have lost that pure pleasure in cooking good food at home and preparing and enjoying it as a family. I know that’s not universally true, but if I generalize the broadest swath of the American population, I think the perspective holds. And that makes me sad.
When I look at the landscape of cooking in America, I see two divergent trends.
On one hand, we’ve taken what should be a pleasure activity and we’ve made it overly serious and competitive. Just look at the proliferation of food competition cooking shows on TV today: Masterchef, Hell’s Kitchen, Iron Chef, Chopped, Beat Bobby Flay, Top Chef, Food Network Challenge. And that list could go on and on and on. To be honest, I think, the cable TV viewership (you can look at this Infinity Dish to know more about it) of these shows tend to exponentially grow because of the competitive spirit. But was cooking ever intended to be something like this?
On another hand, we’ve marginalized cooking and eating with an eye toward less time spent and increased convenience. That’s why supermarkets now have extensive prepared food sections, and freezer sections, and aisles full of ready-to-eat products. Not to mention the increase proportion of meals Americans today eat out at restaurants instead of cooking at home.
Cooking-as-leisure has largely fallen into a forgotten purgatory in America today.
This last point, about Americans spending less time than ever cooking and eating meals, is not merely my own conjecture. It’s lamentable fact. A recent OECD study surveying more than 30 countries found that Americans spend the least amount of time cooking-a scant 30 minutes per day, more than 40% less than the OECD average. Americans also rank very nearly at the bottom for time spent eating per day-27% less than the OECD average. (And yet we in the United States have a shorter life expectancy and fully double the obesity of the average of our OECD peers.)
We romanticize the idea of a leisurely breakfast in Paris, an extended lunch in Spain, a home-cooked feast in Italy. Such experiences aren’t a reality for much of America only because we choose not to prioritize them as a culture. Instead we demote cooking and eating to a nuisance necessity in the way of the next big thing in our overly scheduled lives.
And so this is a call to action. It is a call to take our food both less seriously and more seriously. Let’s stop marginalizing cooking and eating to the tiniest fraction of our days. Let’s stop making food about speed and convenience. And let’s resist the urge to make it overly competitive. Instead, let’s re-capture and embrace a sweet spot in which cooking and eating with friends and family once again becomes a leisure activity, a source of pleasure and physical and emotional health and strengthened relationships.
In this season between Thanksgiving and the end-of-year holidays, I can’t think of a better time to make that happen.
I couldn’t agree more! Cooking has a way of not only warming up the house, but also our hearts.
Thanks Melanie! We feel cooking together is always time well spent.
Well said! I love to cook. Although I have less time during the week, I enjoy making dinner for my family each evening. I love hosting thanksgiving. I think cooking for my family and friends is a way of showing love.
How wonderful that you have such an open kitchen and plenty of “toys” in those cupboards for Master Chef Timothy to play with! The kitchen was always the gathering place in my house and it turned out a pack of kids that love to cook. I was so shocked at the kitchen in my current place. This house was truly among those I’d heard were designed for the family who eats out (they told me nobody cooks anymore). I’ve had small kitchens before, but none like this! Counters uncomfortably high and so wide you can’t reach higher than the first shelf in the cupboard above it. Shelves so short a bottle of vinegar is too tall to fit. And my favorite shocker, only one ~ yes one ~ 4 inch wide drawer in the entire kitchen! Not even a place for silverware. Hopefully people are starting to come back to the kitchen because of wonderful mentors like you!
How wonderful that your kids enjoy cooking. We hope our kids will continue to love to eat well and enjoy the time it take to make traditional “real” food. It sounds like your kitchen is a little tight! Our first apartment was a 400sqft studio with a small kitchen along one wall without any counter space. My Dad added a counter the full length of the room with two large cabinets underneath for storage. Pete affectionately called the counter our third roommate, but it was the only way to make the space functional! 🙂
Hi Peter,
I’ve been reading this blog on and off for over a year but this is the first time I’ve felt compelled to leave a comment. So let me start by voicing appreciation for all the great blogging here at NGNP. My own kitchen instincts fall far short of your own but I have tried a recipe or two from this site and it’s been a positive force for me since having to embark on the GF life last year.
On to my main point: I couldn’t agree more with your comments on the priority of meal preparation. I see from Figure 1.12B on page 23 of this report: http://www.oecd-ilibrary.org/docserver/download/8111041ec003.pdf?expires=1418034453&id=id&accname=guest&checksum=D9A7F736DAA0967AA8330E566CA7A7C9 the US numbers you cite. I’m in Canada and our numbers in the same chart don’t exactly shine, either.
In fact earlier this year I left an extended comment on another GF blog (Sprue Story, which seems to be currently on hiatus according to its last post in Oct) where I sensed western society was losing the plot on this front, although at the time I didn’t have any numbers, OECD or otherwise, to back this up. I don’t presume one way or the other whether you ever happened to see it but I’m going to re-post much of it here since it seems so relevant to this post.
QUOTE
I feel like the food industry has been selling all of us (GFers and non-GFers alike) a lie about food. Let’s acknowledge here that food is first and foremost fuel for our bodies. I’m not saying it can’t or shouldn’t be pleasureable, but it’s not like this was ever carved in stone. Exercise is an equally important in keeping ourselves healthy, but nobody ever said that was easy, either.
With so many so-called “convenience” foods (GF or not) on the market today, it’s like the food industry is selling us this false notion that food doesn’t really deserve that much of our time: why waste time cooking and baking when you could be watching the latest silly youtube video? We’ve lost sight of the fuel fact and psychologically re-framed food as merely this thing that’s just meant to fill a void. Our post-WWII society has collectively bought into this line of thought and we’ve reaped an epidemic of diet-related maladies while we seem to be spending less time than ever on food preparation.
Maybe we need to re-prioritise as a society and allow ourselves more time to focus on the role of food in our lives, and less time on the stuff that in the long run, doesn’t really do us much good. Perhaps we’ll reach a point where we have no choice but to do so; maybe some of us already have.
ENDQUOTE
Since I’m only Some Guy Ranting In The Comment Section, I’m gladdened to see similar sentiments voiced by a reputable blogger with a bigger platform.
This article was wonderful. I’ve grown to love cooking and the great feeling it gives me to be able to sustain myself. Growing up, my family didn’t cook a lot – a beautiful home with a modern kitchen, but no one “had time” to use it! Now, I’ve gotten to the point where I realize I would rather have more time to go grocery shopping and make meals for myself and my friends and family than spend extra time doing other things, because cooking is a great way to let the rest of your day go, and relax while knowing you’re doing something important for mind, body, and spirit. So thank you for sharing!
Hi Peter,
Have you seen this new book called “The Dorito Effect”? I haven’t read it yet but from what I’ve seen in various media accounts, the author contends that our tastes have shifted to snack foods, fast foods and other highly processed foods because they are so highly engineered in their flavouring. Meanwhile more natural foods like chicken and tomatoes have lost the natural flavour they once had, because of modern agricultural practices that prioritise expediency in getting the product to market over quality.
I can’t help but think this is a factor in how food preparation at home has become such a low priority activity — to say nothing of how it has helped fuel outbreaks of diabetes, obesity, etc.
http://www.amazon.com/The-Dorito-Effect-Surprising-Flavor/dp/1476724210